August 27, 2020


Contributor: Sandra Fang, Yin Yang Japan Ambassador


I think you would agree with me that 2020 has been a challenging and unpredictable year. Many people have lived under excess stress, anxiety, and felt isolated. There is an idiom in Chinese, 塞翁失馬,焉知非福. A long story short, it means a setback may turn out to be a blessing in disguise. Everything has two sides, it all depends on what perspective you choose to look at things.

Yoga Studio Tamisa has recently opened a new studio near Matsuiyamate station in Kyotanabe, which is about 40 minutes drive to the south from the city center of Kyoto. Yin Yang yoga wear also opens its shop at the studio. As we witness many businesses collapse during such a difficult time, I truly admire the action of building something new in this economic uncertainty. But on the other hand, I also believe that yoga has never been so important as we face the challenges ahead. The studio has a Bali vibe. Natural lights shine into the two yoga rooms with Japanese cypress flooring. You can also see the beautiful greens through the big windows. This is going to be a great place for people to come to take good care of their bodies and to find comfort in their minds.

I’ve been taking some time off from work. Recently I just went through a miscarriage. I went to my prenatal check-up at 9 weeks and the ultrasound showed that the baby had stopped growing since two weeks ago. The doctor suggested a surgery, so I schedule one a week later, but I was really hoping that it could come out naturally. Two days later, I started to have cramps and bleeding heavily. I passed a lot of tissues out and was almost certain that my uterus had emptied itself.

Miscarriage is definitely not a joyful event to go through, but it’s more common than we think because most people choose not to talk about it. Many women blame themselves when they encounter one. Of course, every miscarriage is different, but most of the early pregnancy loss is due to chromosomal abnormalities in the embryo. It’s not something that the women did or did not do that had caused it. It’s such a natural way that our bodies let go of the unhealthy babies before they can turn into human beings. To me, the uterus is probably the most interesting and powerful organ in the body. It prepares itself again and again for potential pregnancy in every cycle. It is remarkably elastic and has the ability to expand to 500 times its pre-pregnancy size for a full-term baby. It also knows when to contract to clear itself when the pregnancy is no longer viable. Even though this is not the ending I was hoping for, I take it as a blessing that it makes me stronger mentally and it reminds me to treasure life even more.

I remember a prayer that has been circulating for hundreds of years,

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can change
And the wisdom to know the difference.”

I bought myself a flower and a cake after the doctor told me that my uterus had emptied itself and I no longer needed a surgery.